Sophia (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
justpretending) wrote2013-12-08 08:47 pm
justpretending) wrote2013-12-08 08:47 pm
Entry tags:
Terminal Tokyo App
OOC Information
NAME: Ashley
AGE: 22
OTHER CHARACTERS PLAYED: Campbell Saunders, Terra, Juri Katou, Hollyleaf
IC Information
CHARACTER NAME: Sophia
AGE: In canon she’s said to be 6 when we first see her, and about two years or so have passed so far in the series. Recently, however, she’s said to be 10. She acts closer to 8 than 10, so I’m splitting the difference and saying 8, turning 9 in a few months, with this being a mistake by the author.
CANON: The Walking Dead (comic)
CANON POINT: Issue 110
FAMILY TYPES: ALL I am so sorry
APPEARANCE: A cute lil’ blonde girl with freckles and somewhat wavy hair, depending on the day. Have a color-photo example! She’s the little girl!
WHAT A FUCKING HAPPY COMIC THIS LOOKS LIKE, HUH.
PERSONALITY:
It’s okay… I just like to pretend things are different. It makes me happy.
When you’re a child growing up in a zombie apocalypse, there’s a strange line between growing up fast and being a kid. Sophia walks that line very closely. In the early days, she shows herself to be very childish and not understanding a lot about what’s going on, as evident when she asks Carl, who is a year older than her, if her dad could come back since his did. She didn't understand that Carl’s dad was only hurt and missing and not dead and had to have it explained to her, ending with her saying she missed her dad. Moments like this show Sophia’s child-like nature.
At times, she mimics things she hears, trying to make it like she understands them. This can be seen when she tells Carl the gun shot scar he’ll get is going to be sexy. When he tells her she doesn't know what that means, she simply retorts that he doesn't either, and says she thinks it’s the grown-up version of “pretty.” It’s again a childish act, and it’s Sophia’s way of wanting to seem mature, in a very cute way. Another instance of this is her wondering if Rick (Carl’s father) could have his hand grow back after it gets cut off, like a lizard. It can be argued that Sophia asking Carl to be her boyfriend, taking to kissing him on the cheek a lot and holding his hand, is also a way of her trying to imitate the adults she sees. As the only other kids are incredibly young, she’s trying to bond closer with the only other person her age. She pretends she knows more than she does, but when called out on it, she’s rather forthcoming.
Pretending can go a lot farther than just that, however. After her mother, Carol, kills herself by letting a zombie eat her, Sophia shuts down entirely for weeks, going catatonic. The prison the group was using as their home was overrun and the group is split, with many people dying, including Carl’s mother. When Sophia sees Carl again, he tries to talk about the fact that both of their mothers are dead, but Sophia, who has been essentially adopted by a young couple, Glenn and Maggie, says her mother is not dead, and in fact she’s in the next room. She’s insistent, now, about the fact that her parents are alive, pretending for months in her trauma that Glenn and Maggie are her birth parents. When questioned, she just keeps insisting, though not angrily. It’s unclear just how much she’s repressing her memories and how much she’s willingly pretending, as she remembers Carl and everyone else from before, acting just as close to him as she did before.
To this end, when the group arrives in a safe-zone in Alexandria, which acts and functions like a community before the apocalypse, Sophia adapts immediately, taking part in their Halloween celebration and playing with other kids. She buys into the illusion entirely while Carl, who at this point she is a foil to, is very resistant. It takes the safe-zone being breached by undead to really shake her from her peaceful fantasy, and even then she needs Carl to openly tell her that unhappy things happen to her. The moment occurs after Sophia asks Carl if his eye, which he had lost, hurt, and said she felt bad that bad things happen to him and not to her. When confronted, she says she knows that her birth parents are dead, and she’s just pretending that Glenn and Maggie are her mother and father. From what she says, it can be assumed her pretending is out of fear. She’s very frank when she talks to her adoptive parents next, still calling them her mother and father, but saying she’s not as afraid as she used to be, so they can talk about it.
In such a violent environment, Sophia’s got to be brave. That doesn't come easy. Unlike Carl, she doesn't learn how to shoot a gun or defend herself, remaining more of a child. In dangerous situations, she doesn't rush forward like he does to try and help people, she huddles up in fear, as a kid usually would. However, in one instance, she’s proven to be very outgoing in a time of danger, and that’s after Glenn was killed. With the group in high emotions, Maggie started hitting Rick, blaming him for Glenn’s death, and Carl reacted protectively of his father, pulling a gun on Maggie. Though she’s said before she loves Carl and he’s been her close companion throughout the apocalypse, Sophia immediately bites him and has to be pulled off, not wanting to lose her adoptive mother. Later, when the two reconcile and Carl says he wasn't going to shoot Maggie, Sophia is forgiving, if anything out of grief.
Unlike before, when confronted with extreme loss and grief, Sophia doesn't retreat inward. In fact, she gets a little angrier. Maggie moves her to the Hilltop Colony, which is a different community that Glenn wanted them to live in before he died, as a way of finding a hopefully more peaceful life and making a new way for them, as Maggie is pregnant. In the few times Sophia’s been seen since, it’s apparent she’s not in school, like the other kids in the community, likely out of rebellion. She says she doesn't want to go to school, and instead wants to go “home.” It can be assumed she still sees the Alexandria safe-zone as home, and though some time has passed, she has not adapted like she did before. She’s seen later playing with another kid her age, but it’s important to note that it takes a lot of time and it’s not clear how much she’s adjusted. It’s safe to say she’s still dealing with Glenn’s death and the separation from Carl and everyone else she knows, instead of bottling it up like everything else. She has grown in this way.
Just because she’s inherently childish does not mean Sophia can’t have her grown-up moments and moments of insight. Early in the series, when they are still making their safe house in the prison, Sophia says as she and Carl watch the undead that she feels sorry for them and is not in fact scared of them, because they look sad. She still reacts with fear when walkers approach throughout the series, but due to how many people she’s lost or almost lost, it’s likely that this is from fear of losing more. At one point, after Glenn’s death, she asks Carl if the people around her keep dying because they’re around her. It’s a lot of despair for a young girl to be carrying, and it’s a moment very much like her saying the zombies are sad. Sophia sees things in a different way, trying to rationalize why everyone is dying. The chaotic world doesn't make sense to her as it is, and in her grief, she blames herself.
Some of this may be from the fact that many of those who've died in her life or almost died did so by their own hand. It’s implied her father killed himself, or at least did nothing to prevent dying, as her mother Carol says he “wasted away” after losing everyone. After Carol grew despairing, the man she’d grown attached to cheating on her, she tried to kill herself unsuccessfully, with Sophia watching. Later, after both Rick and Lori (Carl’s mother) rejected her advances, she was more successful in her attempts. At one point before they reached the Alexandria safe-zone, Maggie too tried to kill herself in a depressed state over her own family being dead. Afterward, Sophia asks Maggie to promise not to leave her. It’s likely that having to worry about her family dying by their own hand as well as the regular worries in this world pushes this self-blame she eventually wonders about, as she may think they leave because of her.
After she comes to terms with everything that’s happened, Sophia shows just as much love for Glenn and Maggie as when she pretended they were her birth parents. She doesn't stop calling them mommy and daddy, and the only time she disobeys or fights with one of them is in her insistence that she and Maggie return to the Alexandria safe-zone. Like with Carl, she’s at times clingy with them, as she values those who she loves above all else. If Sophia decides she loves someone, nothing can make her stop, and they become her whole world. Given how little there is left in the world, it’s frankly understandable, isn't it?
HISTORY: A concise history of this poor kid’s life, with a troll sentence at the end of The Prison section, so please ignore that one.
SAMPLES
FIRST PERSON:
If you could make any reality at all, what would you make?
Can I have my daddy back? And my mommy- my real mommy? I miss both of them a lot. I like the mommy I have right now. Can they all be my mommies and daddy? I want them back, and I want all the walkers to not be here anymore. …And I think I wanna play again like I used to.
If you were given the option to stay in the Digital World, or return home, which would you choose? Why?
I don’t like home anymore. I don’t wanna go back there, I wanna bring everyone here. I guess I’ll stay, but only if they can come too, okay? Promise you’ll bring everyone here, and then I’ll stay.
What would make up your ideal friend?
You've gotta be nice, and not mean, and fun. Don’t kill people, at least not good people. I guess if you've gotta kill bad people, that’s okay. I know a lot of people who kill bad people, and they’re still my friends. You gotta wanna play with me! I like a lot of games, so you don’t have to worry about that. We can play catch, or cards, or tag, or anything. So are you gonna be my friend?
THIRD PERSON:
Sophia doesn't know if these things are bad or not. They look a lot like her old stuffed animals, especially the little one who called himself Culumon. But her stuffed animals didn't talk, and she doesn't think she’s lucky enough to wind up somewhere good.
Well, this isn't exactly lucky anyway. Her mommy’s not here with her, and she misses her terribly.
The tiny Digimon in her arms is a bit of a comfort, though. It can speak to her, just like another person, and it doesn't have any guns or knives or sharp baseball bats, and it promises it wants to help her be happy. It doesn't remind her of the bad people like the Governor or Negan, or like the walkers. It’s still weird, though. This is like a cartoon, like one she’d watch before everyone started dying. She wonders a bit if she’s pretending all of this. Maybe she’s gotten too sad again, and everything here is just another way of pretending. Maybe she’s just trying to make herself happy.
But no, if that was true, then her mommy would be here, and Carl. And her daddy too, but she knows her daddy can’t come back. She wouldn't pretend him alive again.
Still, it’s a little comforting. This could all be real, and Sophia could actually really be somewhere good. In the warm bed that she’s been told is hers, with the little Digimon cuddling up to her, she feels. A little safe.
Sophia curls up and closes her eyes, and very quietly wishes that her mother will show up magically; if magic things are going to happen, maybe she can wish very hard and make another one. It’d be very nice if she could.
NAME: Ashley
AGE: 22
OTHER CHARACTERS PLAYED: Campbell Saunders, Terra, Juri Katou, Hollyleaf
IC Information
CHARACTER NAME: Sophia
AGE: In canon she’s said to be 6 when we first see her, and about two years or so have passed so far in the series. Recently, however, she’s said to be 10. She acts closer to 8 than 10, so I’m splitting the difference and saying 8, turning 9 in a few months, with this being a mistake by the author.
CANON: The Walking Dead (comic)
CANON POINT: Issue 110
FAMILY TYPES: ALL I am so sorry
APPEARANCE: A cute lil’ blonde girl with freckles and somewhat wavy hair, depending on the day. Have a color-photo example! She’s the little girl!
WHAT A FUCKING HAPPY COMIC THIS LOOKS LIKE, HUH.
PERSONALITY:
It’s okay… I just like to pretend things are different. It makes me happy.
When you’re a child growing up in a zombie apocalypse, there’s a strange line between growing up fast and being a kid. Sophia walks that line very closely. In the early days, she shows herself to be very childish and not understanding a lot about what’s going on, as evident when she asks Carl, who is a year older than her, if her dad could come back since his did. She didn't understand that Carl’s dad was only hurt and missing and not dead and had to have it explained to her, ending with her saying she missed her dad. Moments like this show Sophia’s child-like nature.
At times, she mimics things she hears, trying to make it like she understands them. This can be seen when she tells Carl the gun shot scar he’ll get is going to be sexy. When he tells her she doesn't know what that means, she simply retorts that he doesn't either, and says she thinks it’s the grown-up version of “pretty.” It’s again a childish act, and it’s Sophia’s way of wanting to seem mature, in a very cute way. Another instance of this is her wondering if Rick (Carl’s father) could have his hand grow back after it gets cut off, like a lizard. It can be argued that Sophia asking Carl to be her boyfriend, taking to kissing him on the cheek a lot and holding his hand, is also a way of her trying to imitate the adults she sees. As the only other kids are incredibly young, she’s trying to bond closer with the only other person her age. She pretends she knows more than she does, but when called out on it, she’s rather forthcoming.
Pretending can go a lot farther than just that, however. After her mother, Carol, kills herself by letting a zombie eat her, Sophia shuts down entirely for weeks, going catatonic. The prison the group was using as their home was overrun and the group is split, with many people dying, including Carl’s mother. When Sophia sees Carl again, he tries to talk about the fact that both of their mothers are dead, but Sophia, who has been essentially adopted by a young couple, Glenn and Maggie, says her mother is not dead, and in fact she’s in the next room. She’s insistent, now, about the fact that her parents are alive, pretending for months in her trauma that Glenn and Maggie are her birth parents. When questioned, she just keeps insisting, though not angrily. It’s unclear just how much she’s repressing her memories and how much she’s willingly pretending, as she remembers Carl and everyone else from before, acting just as close to him as she did before.
To this end, when the group arrives in a safe-zone in Alexandria, which acts and functions like a community before the apocalypse, Sophia adapts immediately, taking part in their Halloween celebration and playing with other kids. She buys into the illusion entirely while Carl, who at this point she is a foil to, is very resistant. It takes the safe-zone being breached by undead to really shake her from her peaceful fantasy, and even then she needs Carl to openly tell her that unhappy things happen to her. The moment occurs after Sophia asks Carl if his eye, which he had lost, hurt, and said she felt bad that bad things happen to him and not to her. When confronted, she says she knows that her birth parents are dead, and she’s just pretending that Glenn and Maggie are her mother and father. From what she says, it can be assumed her pretending is out of fear. She’s very frank when she talks to her adoptive parents next, still calling them her mother and father, but saying she’s not as afraid as she used to be, so they can talk about it.
In such a violent environment, Sophia’s got to be brave. That doesn't come easy. Unlike Carl, she doesn't learn how to shoot a gun or defend herself, remaining more of a child. In dangerous situations, she doesn't rush forward like he does to try and help people, she huddles up in fear, as a kid usually would. However, in one instance, she’s proven to be very outgoing in a time of danger, and that’s after Glenn was killed. With the group in high emotions, Maggie started hitting Rick, blaming him for Glenn’s death, and Carl reacted protectively of his father, pulling a gun on Maggie. Though she’s said before she loves Carl and he’s been her close companion throughout the apocalypse, Sophia immediately bites him and has to be pulled off, not wanting to lose her adoptive mother. Later, when the two reconcile and Carl says he wasn't going to shoot Maggie, Sophia is forgiving, if anything out of grief.
Unlike before, when confronted with extreme loss and grief, Sophia doesn't retreat inward. In fact, she gets a little angrier. Maggie moves her to the Hilltop Colony, which is a different community that Glenn wanted them to live in before he died, as a way of finding a hopefully more peaceful life and making a new way for them, as Maggie is pregnant. In the few times Sophia’s been seen since, it’s apparent she’s not in school, like the other kids in the community, likely out of rebellion. She says she doesn't want to go to school, and instead wants to go “home.” It can be assumed she still sees the Alexandria safe-zone as home, and though some time has passed, she has not adapted like she did before. She’s seen later playing with another kid her age, but it’s important to note that it takes a lot of time and it’s not clear how much she’s adjusted. It’s safe to say she’s still dealing with Glenn’s death and the separation from Carl and everyone else she knows, instead of bottling it up like everything else. She has grown in this way.
Just because she’s inherently childish does not mean Sophia can’t have her grown-up moments and moments of insight. Early in the series, when they are still making their safe house in the prison, Sophia says as she and Carl watch the undead that she feels sorry for them and is not in fact scared of them, because they look sad. She still reacts with fear when walkers approach throughout the series, but due to how many people she’s lost or almost lost, it’s likely that this is from fear of losing more. At one point, after Glenn’s death, she asks Carl if the people around her keep dying because they’re around her. It’s a lot of despair for a young girl to be carrying, and it’s a moment very much like her saying the zombies are sad. Sophia sees things in a different way, trying to rationalize why everyone is dying. The chaotic world doesn't make sense to her as it is, and in her grief, she blames herself.
Some of this may be from the fact that many of those who've died in her life or almost died did so by their own hand. It’s implied her father killed himself, or at least did nothing to prevent dying, as her mother Carol says he “wasted away” after losing everyone. After Carol grew despairing, the man she’d grown attached to cheating on her, she tried to kill herself unsuccessfully, with Sophia watching. Later, after both Rick and Lori (Carl’s mother) rejected her advances, she was more successful in her attempts. At one point before they reached the Alexandria safe-zone, Maggie too tried to kill herself in a depressed state over her own family being dead. Afterward, Sophia asks Maggie to promise not to leave her. It’s likely that having to worry about her family dying by their own hand as well as the regular worries in this world pushes this self-blame she eventually wonders about, as she may think they leave because of her.
After she comes to terms with everything that’s happened, Sophia shows just as much love for Glenn and Maggie as when she pretended they were her birth parents. She doesn't stop calling them mommy and daddy, and the only time she disobeys or fights with one of them is in her insistence that she and Maggie return to the Alexandria safe-zone. Like with Carl, she’s at times clingy with them, as she values those who she loves above all else. If Sophia decides she loves someone, nothing can make her stop, and they become her whole world. Given how little there is left in the world, it’s frankly understandable, isn't it?
HISTORY: A concise history of this poor kid’s life, with a troll sentence at the end of The Prison section, so please ignore that one.
SAMPLES
FIRST PERSON:
If you could make any reality at all, what would you make?
Can I have my daddy back? And my mommy- my real mommy? I miss both of them a lot. I like the mommy I have right now. Can they all be my mommies and daddy? I want them back, and I want all the walkers to not be here anymore. …And I think I wanna play again like I used to.
If you were given the option to stay in the Digital World, or return home, which would you choose? Why?
I don’t like home anymore. I don’t wanna go back there, I wanna bring everyone here. I guess I’ll stay, but only if they can come too, okay? Promise you’ll bring everyone here, and then I’ll stay.
What would make up your ideal friend?
You've gotta be nice, and not mean, and fun. Don’t kill people, at least not good people. I guess if you've gotta kill bad people, that’s okay. I know a lot of people who kill bad people, and they’re still my friends. You gotta wanna play with me! I like a lot of games, so you don’t have to worry about that. We can play catch, or cards, or tag, or anything. So are you gonna be my friend?
THIRD PERSON:
Sophia doesn't know if these things are bad or not. They look a lot like her old stuffed animals, especially the little one who called himself Culumon. But her stuffed animals didn't talk, and she doesn't think she’s lucky enough to wind up somewhere good.
Well, this isn't exactly lucky anyway. Her mommy’s not here with her, and she misses her terribly.
The tiny Digimon in her arms is a bit of a comfort, though. It can speak to her, just like another person, and it doesn't have any guns or knives or sharp baseball bats, and it promises it wants to help her be happy. It doesn't remind her of the bad people like the Governor or Negan, or like the walkers. It’s still weird, though. This is like a cartoon, like one she’d watch before everyone started dying. She wonders a bit if she’s pretending all of this. Maybe she’s gotten too sad again, and everything here is just another way of pretending. Maybe she’s just trying to make herself happy.
But no, if that was true, then her mommy would be here, and Carl. And her daddy too, but she knows her daddy can’t come back. She wouldn't pretend him alive again.
Still, it’s a little comforting. This could all be real, and Sophia could actually really be somewhere good. In the warm bed that she’s been told is hers, with the little Digimon cuddling up to her, she feels. A little safe.
Sophia curls up and closes her eyes, and very quietly wishes that her mother will show up magically; if magic things are going to happen, maybe she can wish very hard and make another one. It’d be very nice if she could.